Six weeks since my last post. Yikes. Aside from my summer hiatus when life was “normal,” I’ve never taken such a big pause between sharing my thoughts. But life is far beyond normal, and somehow time seems to stand still and race ahead at the same time. I do find comfort in the knowledge there are only three weeks left in this horrendous year.
Writing has always been one of my escape mechanisms. During these past six weeks, however, I’ve simply been too tired to put more than a few sentences together. And it’s not just physical fatigue. This is the most mental exhaustion I can remember pushing through since I don’t know when. Of course, I realize I’m not alone. Especially since I hear more fatigue, fear and frustration in the voices of the people I speak with every day in my work with the Test & Trace Corps. Twenty weeks into the job I never could have dreamed having during my lifetime, the number of those voices has exploded. When our call center opened yesterday, there were 10,000 calls to be made to cases and contacts throughout Manhattan and the five boroughs.
So forgive me if this isn’t one of more eloquent posts. Like many New Yorkers and I imagine, most Americans, I’m tired. Tired in my body, heart and soul. So finding daily comforts has become increasingly important with each day I’m blessed to open my bloodshot eyes. As the official start of winter creeps closer, my 2020 self-care indulgences include wine, baths, Vitamin D supplements in addition to my daily multi-vitamin, lots of candles and anything scented with lavender. I encourage everyone to find your own creature comforts and moments of Zen – no matter how fleeting – whenever you can.
I don’t mean to sound so heavy. I do love the ability to talk with my fellow New Yorkers and know the Test & Trace program is helping many of them by providing everything from the phone number for the city’s mental health hotline to assistance with food and medication deliveries. I am beyond thankful I’ve gotten to see my parents this year, especially when I know many families have been separated since the pandemic began. I am thankful for my husband, family and friends who worry about my well-being. I am thankful for the doctors, nurses and researchers who keep fighting the good fight and the essential workers who keep our city open. And I look forward to celebrating another Christmas – even if it involves a virtual get-together with our usual holiday crowd – and of course, to ringing in the start of what has to be a better New Year.
Thank you for entertaining my random thoughts through these difficult months and for all the support you’ve offered from near and far. I wish all of my readers moments of peace and happiness during this strange holiday season. Here’s to a safe end to 2020 and all good thoughts for a 2021 filled with new chances to have fun, be fit and feel fabulous!